Cold Turkey

"I'm going to have a detox" A proudly announced on Sunday night. "No coffee, no tea, no beer, no fizzy pop. I'm going to drink only water and smoothies for a week."

Being a dutiful wife, I took the usual amount of notice one takes of these things and presented him with a cup of Kenco's finest at 6.30 yesterday morning. "Be gone, spawn of the devil" he said as he thrust it back at me. Or at least that's what it sounded like. I was still suffering from buzzing in the ears and a lack of sleep after all - a second cup of coffee within 5 minutes helped no end...

In the evening I luxuriated in being able to have some ginger beer - normally it's all gone by Monday, but not this week! Sean Bean and ginger beer - what more could a girl want?

This morning I remembered (well done Nic!) and presented him with a smoothie and a glass of water. See, I do listen to you, darling.

This evening he stomped into the house, muttered about feeling crap, cracked open a bottle of Stella and checked I had bought a new jar of coffee. Apparently his colleagues were begging him to take on board some caffeine before either they or he slashed his wrists in despair.

I'm guessing the detox is now officially over for this year...